In You I Trust
by theunknownvoice
Summary: Trust is a precious commodity. Can two soul reapers who still feel the scars of betrayal learn to trust again or will fate force them to face their own demons?
1. The Betrayed

In You I Trust

By: theunknownvoice

Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach.

Chapter 1: The Betrayed

Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach.

There were few in Soul Society who focused on the chaos within the Gotei 13. It was easier to ignore the problems of fellow shinigami who were not in your bantai. There were just too many individuals for every captain to personally keep track of.

Ukitake, however, had too much time on his hands. Frequently at the hospital and too ill to do anything, he could spend his time thinking and associating with fellow shinigami. It was one of the things he had had in common with his deceased vice-captain that individual members mattered. People, the individual, mattered to Ukitake and he had noticed.

"You are thinking too hard Jushiro," Shunsui said.

It was the afternoon meeting between the two captains and a bottle of sake and a box of chocolate was between them.

"Sometimes I think this place sucks the life out of people. Being a shinigami must result in a death sentence and the more life a shinigami has the more Soul Society tortures them. Look at those we have lost. Kaien who had more life than anyone I knew is dead. Rukia is a shell. Soi Fon is embroiled by bitterness and now this," Ukitake replied.

"You think too much Jushiro. People change. Life moves on," Shunsui replied.

But Ukitake only shook his head. "No, you're wrong my friend. Something is happening and this time it won't take one person but two."

Shunsui wanted to argue that the old man wouldn't let that happen but he knew better. Yamamoto was too tied into his ways to see the disaster standing in front of them. Trouble was brewing in the Seireitie long before Ichimaru, Aizen and Tosen had left.

"What can we do Jushiro if you're right?"

Ukitake only looked at his friend before replying. "I don't know but kami help those two before they too are another causality of Soul Society."

He hated the blasted paperwork. Why the hell was he a vice-captain again?

Oh that's right the pay was better.

Who was he kidding?

He liked being a shinigami. It was something he was good and there were few things he considered himself good at.

He used to believe he was good at judging the character of a person. He could understand a person but after Tosen—

He couldn't even think of his former captain.

Tosen had been the type of man Shuhei Hisagi tried to be. He wanted to be the man that held onto honor and believed in justice. He wanted to be the type of person who didn't overburden his subordinates. The type of man that believed in justice. Maybe that type of man didn't exist.

The paperwork laid sprawled out in front him waiting for him.

"Paperwork was invented to drive us crazy."

He recognized the lilting voice of the well endowed female lieutenant.

"What brings you here Rangiku?"

"Can't a friend say hello?"

He wanted to roll his eyes at the woman. They were friends. It was a painful truth after he had tried to make them more but he had been forced to accept it. Rangiku Matsumoto wasn't interested in him. She preferred men with lighter hair for one verging on silver and white.

"Why are you really here Ran-chan?"

Matsumoto's smile fled her face. It was obvious even after the betrayal two months before that Shuhei was still struggling with what happened. She had accepted it primarily because Hitsugaya was there to pull her back from falling. Shuhei didn't have anyone like that.

"Are you sure you'll alright Shuhei?"

He glared. What the hell was it with everyone asking him that? First there was Captain-Commander Yamamoto, then Captain Komamura, Captain Ukitake, and now Matsumoto?

She could feel his retsai rising.

"Shuhei?"

"Leave Rangiku. I don't want to talk."

"Captain Unohana asked if you would come by," Matsumoto said as she fled the room.

Her friend was scaring her. He was falling further and further into despair. She didn't want to remember the smirk or the whispered, "Gomen Rangiku." No she couldn't think of him. She didn't want to.

The memory of blue-green eyes that could see through her kept her from crying. She hated seeing her friend hurt by betrayal but she herself was still dealing with what happened. The green eyes pulled her back. She needed to be safe right now. She needed to know she was loved.

She needed sake, a couch, and Hitsugaya because only Hitsugaya could make her feel better.

Captain Unohana sat glancing at the monitor. There was still no change. Aside from waking up a few times with nightmares, Hinamori hadn't been very responsive. To make matters worse Hitsugaya didn't want to spend time here.

"_I've talked to her Captain Unohana and there is no point. I don't value the sentimentality of this."_

"_But Captain Hitsugaya, you and Hinamori-chan are childhood friends surely—"_

"_Hinamori and I may have grown up together but we are hardly close now. Besides I don't see the point of talking to her. It makes no difference."_

"_She just needs someone to call her back."_

"_No, she needs to heal."_

She hadn't been able to convince him of anything else. He had left the temperature dropping as his anger grew. There was no point in pursuing him. Hitsugaya had already made up his mind.

The knock on her door shook her out of her thoughts. She glanced at the tattooed lieutenant.

"You requested me Captain Unohana?"

"Lieutenant Hisagi, I have a request to make of you."

"What can I do for you captain? I hope it doesn't take to long. I have to return to my division."

She hadn't forgotten that his division was in shambles. The betrayal had shaken everything but perhaps he could help her more the others could. Kira had been hesitatant when she had asked him.

"_I raised my sword at her. I—"_

Renji was preparing to go to the human world and Hisagi was the last person she knew that had some closeness with her patient.

"Please come with me."

Hisagi followed as she led him towards the back rooms of her division. He hated hospitals. Even when Isane who had been one of his closest friends from the academy was the one treating him, he didn't care to be here.

He saw Isane treating a patient and shot her a small smile. She smiled back at him before returning to her patient. Isane was a healer and for once Shuhei wished he wasn't a fighter. Fighters brought more misery to people. Fighters maimed and killed while healers put back together broken people.

But he couldn't deny his was fighter and anymore than he could make himself a healer. He didn't care to piece together people. He would rather protect.

The air in this part of the medical wing was stale. There was no smell but it tasted of disinfectant. It was so silent that it multiplied the emptiness.

He could hear the faint sound of the ventilator. It was pushing up and down and the bubbling sound of water. He glanced at the bed his eyes taking in the pale figure.

She had always been small but the bed made her smaller. She was paler than before and her eyes were tightly closed. He would have thought her dead if he couldn't feel the faintness of her spiritual pressure.

"You are the last person I know that can perhaps reach. Just talk to her."

Hisagi swallowed before nodding.

For once he realized that he wasn't the only one who had been betrayed.

To be continued…..


	2. To Talk

Chapter 2: To Talk

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

He didn't hear Unohana leave as he stared at the pale figure in the bed. He had never seen her hair down before. It struck him as odd since he had known her for years but it was true. Hinamori always wore her hair in a bun. With it down it just reminded him of how young she was.

Part of him didn't want to be here. He had come here once before when she was first admitted. Kira had needed the moral support. But that was before she had lapsed into this coma and the captains had made their betrayal official.

This was probably going to be one of the stupidest things he had ever done in his life. But he was Momo's sempai and her friend in some form. They had never been as close as he was with Renji and Kira but she had always been happy to see him. What did he have to loose?

A few moments of time?

Paperwork?

Alright he could do this. Just breathe, and don't pay attention to how emotional this is.

"I don't know what to tell you Hinamori. I don't know what to do for you. I mean you're in this bed and I can't do anything which seems to be where I'm at lately. I can't do anything for anyone. Not even you."

She didn't move or anything as he spoke. He might as well keep going.

"I don't like seeing you like this. I wouldn't like seeing anyone like this. I mean—What the hell do I tell you? They haven't caught any of them. Not even the man that put you here. I—This is just stupid! What the hell can I do for you? What can I do? I don't know what to do?"

"Please Shuhei, don't give up on Momo."

He turned around to glance at Isane. "What can I do for her Isane? What the hell can I do? I can't even prevent my captain from doing something stupid."

He stormed out of the room. He didn't want to hear anymore from her.

Isane gazed at her friend. She didn't want to remember how horrible that day had been.

"_Isane-chan, you always are so nice to those you heal."_

"_I'm just doing my job, captain."_

She shivered. Isane didn't want to remember.

-

Paperwork. What the hell was it about being a captain and paperwork?

He glanced at the sake bottle sitting next to him. He might as well drink some. The liquid burned as it went down his throat. But least now he felt something. The burning made him feel.

He used to believe that there was such a thing as honor. Now he knew that was a lie. Justice was a lie. Everything was a lie. There was no truth.

The burning felt better. The burning made the world fade around him.

For a moment he was the kid running through the Rukongai again not some jaded lieutenant. Back then he had wanted to crawl out of that hellhole and go to the academy. Being a soul reaper was a way out.

At the academy he had loved to fight. He had loved what being a soul reaper meant. When he became Tosen's lieutenant he was proud. Here was a man he could admire.

Tosen was a lie though.

He took another swig of the sake.

_Please Kami, let me just pass it out drunk. Let me forget._

He woke up the next morning his face smashed with paperwork. The sake bottle was tipped over and a mound of paperwork was sticking together.

"Can't something go freakin' right for me? Does somebody just hate me? Can't I have anything go right."

He picked up the vase off of Tosen's desk and threw it at the wall."

"Nobody hates you, Lieutenant Hisagi."

He turned towards the fourth division captain.

"What can I do for you Captain Unohana?"

Unohana pretended not see the sake bottle. Utitake had spoken to her this morning about his theory. She had agreed and now she knew Utitake was right. There were two lives hanging in the balance.

"I understand you left suddenly yesterday."

"Look Captain I doubt that I can do anything for Hinamori."

"Lieutenant Hisagi, Lieutenant Hinamori needs someone to reach her. Someone to call her back. You are the last hope she has."

Hisagi felt his mind reeling. He already knew that both Hitsugaya and Kira refused to do this. Renji was leaving. That did mean he was the only one left.

"What if it doesn't work?"

Unohana looked at the broken lieutenant. "Even if it doesn't perhaps just talking to someone can help you, lieutenant. After all you understand what Hinamori is going through better than anyone else."

-

He hated coming here. He decided on that right at the beginning as he glanced once again at the lifeless figure.

"Looks like it's just you and me, Momo. I might as well as call you by your first name since I'm going to be visiting."

He couldn't help feeling that this was pointless but everyone had left Hinamori. Hitsugaya was gone to the human world as was Renji. Kira didn't have the strength to do this.

"I know I'm probably not who you want to see but the others are busy. Besides we all miss you. Who else is there that can diss all of our kido without being insulting?"

He chuckled at the memory of her trying to show him kido.

"_Sempai, you're doing it wrong. Just relax and let it flow through you."_

"_We've been at this for hours Hinamori. Besides kido is why I failed the graduation exam so many times."_

_She poked him. "With an attitude like that sempai no wonder you don't get it. Just relax and do what I do."_

"You never made fun of me. Even though you spent hours with me and I still couldn't do it. You didn't give up on me either but promised you'd teach me later. I'm holding you to that."

When he left at the end of an hour he felt better. Sure she hadn't answered him but he hadn't been alone. Shuhei Hisagi hated being alone.

-

Unohana looked in on her patient. For the past three weeks Hinamori hadn't been improving. She was in a stable state but Unohana noticed the girl's room wasn't so lifeless.

Hisagi came everyday and for an hour he would sit and talk to Hinamori. The lieutenant was still adjusting to his responsibilities but he never neglected to come.

To Unohana it was a refreshing change. She watered the plants in her office after walking away from Hinamori's room.

The fourth division captain had gone through many patients over the years. Few had been in such a state as Hinamori but the girl by far wasn't the most troublesome of her patients. There had been the lieutenant that couldn't be quiet and demanded to be released. He had launched the division into a state of panic. The ever gentle Unohana had wanted to strangle that man. (A/N: Take a wild guess who that particular lieutenant is.)

There had been Soi Fon who refused to be put on bed rest even though she had broken numerous bones. Captain Utitake needed his medicine sweetened otherwise he refused to take it. Unohana cringed when she thought of the eleventh division. Zaraki Kenpachi was the worst patient she had ever had. That man needed to be drugged just so she could heal his wounds and he needed to have a scar.

"_Real men have scars!"_

Unohana snorted real men indeed. Still the thing with Hinamori was bothering her. She had waited long enough for the girl to bring herself out of the coma. Something had to be done soon.

"Isane?"

"Yes Captain."

"Bring me Lieutenant Hinamori's file. I need to see if there is any change."

"Yes Captain."

-

"I don't know what to tell you, Momo."

Hisagi rubbed his eyes. It was four o'clock in the morning and he couldn't sleep yet again. Nothing, not even that damn paperwork, could cause him to grow tired. Of course then he remembered Hinamori.

He would have to visit her sometime that day so why not now?

Of course didn't know if she even knew he was there. It had been bothering him more and more lately.

What exactly had Aizen put her through?

He could see where the traitor's zanpakto had sliced through Hinamori's flesh. The wound would scar and even Unohana couldn't do anything about it. It wasn't fair that someone like Hinamori who was innocent had suffered this way.

He didn't need to think about that right now. Instead he needed to focus. His division needed him to pull it together. They were leaderless if he fell apart.

He sank further into his chair and put his head into his hands. Could he do this? He could be that type of man?

"I don't know what to do. I have to take care of my division but I don't know where to start. Tosen made it look easy. I'm not good enough to be a leader."

The barely felt the touch on his shoulder as a small hand moved towards him.

It was a gentle whisper, "You'll be alright sempai. You'll find a way."

His eyes snapped as he glanced at the girl in the bed.

To be continued…..


	3. A Wake but Still Unknowing

Chapter 3: Awake but Still Unknowing

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

A/N: To everyone who has been following this fic, I'm so sorry. I never meant to fall behind if you read my bio you'll see my proffered excuse but really there is no excuse for leaving people hanging. I hate when writer's do that. I really do and when I started fanfiction, I promised not to fall behind. So in apology here is the next chapter. Also nobody guessed who the crazed Lieutenant giving Unohana trouble in the past was. If you read my stuff then you'd know I'm a Kaien fan and that Kaien frequently finds himself working into my stories. Also the person Isane was remembering while shivering was Gin.

Her brown eyes were wide open gazing back at him and Shuheei felt his breathing even. He had wanted her to wake up for so long and now to see her staring back was strange. He was used to the closed eyes and the gentle breathing.

"Sempai, where am I?"

"The fourth divison," he said softly.

"The fourth division…why are you visiting sempai? Did something happen? Where's Aizen-taicho?"

At the mention of Aizen, Shuuhei looked at her in horror. He could see nothing but innocence behind those brown eyes. It was if she had blocked everything out to keep herself from falling apart. He forced himself to look at her retsai closely. There faintly surrounding her, he could see the work of a kidou.

She must have done this to herself knowing that the truth would be too painful. Locking herself away and erasing memories to prevent herself from seeing the truth.

It gave him another reason to hate Aizen. The man had tortured Momo and convinced her to trust only him. The manipulations had been subtle and had Shuuhei been a better friend or a more seasoned veteran he would have seen the marks.

What had Kaien Shiba told him before going on the mission that killed the lieutenant? It was a faint memory but Shuuhei could still see the training grounds and the young lieutenant staring out watching Rukia Kuchiki in the distance.

"_Hisagi-kun? I didn't expect you."_

_Shuuhei nodded before moving closer to the other lieutenant. "I wanted to know if you had some advice. Everyone from Ichimaru, down has given me advice and you…"_

_Kaien laughed. "I don't give advice unless it's needed. I'm not that way. No shinigmai's perfect and far be it from me to make myself look perfect."_

_His eyes measured Shuhhei rather readily. "You're that kid Kensei saved years ago aren't you?"_

"_How'd did you know?"_

"_The tribute on your face. Not many people remember Kensei or the others. A lot of them won't talk about them considering the secretiveness of their disappearance."_

"_Do you know what happened?"_

_Kaien stared out at the field once again. In the distance Shuhhei could make out a vague female figure trying desperately to form a kata. Her small hands gripping a wooden sword and struggling to maintain position. _

"_No one does. Soul Society has many secrets," Kaien said. "They use too many people as pawns. Keep an eye on your subordinates, Hisagai. There are too many games in Soul Society and they will get caught up in them."_

Gazing at Hinamori, Hisagi could see the truth of those words. The webs of Soul Society had caught the young girl and Hinamori had been trained to believe herself weak. He gripped her hand softly.

"Hinamori-kun, how much of what I said did you hear?"

"Just that you don't know what to do, sempai. But you always know what to do. You always find the answers even when things look bleak. That's why you're one of the best sempai. You see answers where others only see problems."

"Hinamori-chan, could you wait while I get Captain Unohana? She needs to know you are awake."

The girl's eyes clouded once more. "Please sempai, I need more time. More time before Unohana-taicho comes and does what she views necessary. I need more time…"

He could see the thin thread cracking of her kido.

"Hinamori-chan, your bantai needs you. There is no time for you to wait and pretend to be ill. The fifth division is crumbling and unless you take over soon there will be nothing left. The other captains are trying to make order out of the chaos but it has fallen on Kira-kun, Ran-chan and I to divide your responsibilities. The fifth division needs a leader. Only you can do that Hinamori-chan."

"My third seat should be able to fill in my absence."

"Your third seat is dead and your fourth and fifth are confused. There is little that they can do and the lower seats do not trust them. They don't trust anyone now that their captain is gone."

"Aizen-taicho…what happened?"

She working herself and Shuhhei gripped her arms. "A lot has changed. Third, fifth and ninth division are all without captains. It is up to their lieutenants to take on their responsibilities. You are needed Hinamori-chan."

Tears glistened in her dark eyes but she nodded.

"Tell Unohana-taichou, I am a wake."

Hinamori did her paperwork in silence. Unohana had pronounced her well enough after a week stay in the hospital. She had been in perfect physical health but she knew Unohana was worried about her mind. She had heard the medical team whisper of amnesia and temporary memory loss.

Most people avoided her with the clear exception of her sempai. They often had lunch together telling each of other of their day and sharing their thoughts. It was a weird act of confession but Hinamori was grateful to be absolved by him and to absolve him in the same moment. Their shared sin, the sin of being left behind, clung to them both but together Hinamori could feel it cut less deeply. Hisagai did not judge her. In this act, he was the only one.

Though her memories were dampened, Hinamori had listened stoically to the prior events as Yamato-sou-taicho informed him. She could not believe Azien-sama a traitor, but when she looked at Shuuhei she saw the truth. His eyes flashed with anger, with truth and she could not deny that something had changed her captain. Something had made him commit the crimes against Soul Society. In the darkness of the night she found her answer in a pair of flashing ruby eyes.

Her friends became uncomfortable when she spoke about her theory that Ichimaru was the true conspirator. From him had come the plans that had destroyed the other two captains. She could see their sad smiles as they merely looked at her. Hisagai did not judge but she could tell he did not agree.

She bent over the paperwork forcing her perfect kanji on the page.

_**You've hidden long enough Momo.**_ Tobiume mutters.

She splatters ink before glancing at her zanpaktou. Tobiume has not spoken to her since she woke up.

_**I can only pray that someone perhaps your sempai finds you once I do this.**_

She stares in horror and tries to remove her zanpaktou from its sheath but Tobiume isn't letting her go. Tobiume is kidou and he is pulling away at the cloak she made herself. He rips it apart knowing that she needs to be free of it and accept the truth if she is to survive in this world. She can no longer only see the things she wants. She is his bearer and he knows her potential better than anyone even herself.

_**I am not sorry. This will hurt you but you must wake up. You must come to this world with the understanding of the truth.**_

The kidou falls from her. After a month of working as she in the waking world, it collapses pulling the barrier from her mind. Allowing her to feel and see what has happened. The horror of the body pinned to the walls of fifth division. The eyes of her captain glazed in death.

She had screamed mourning him then. Loving him for her had been parent, teacher, and lover to her. He had claimed her as his own and she had tripped over her own feet desperate to please. He had looked at her and allowed her access. She was lost without a captain.

Then the feeling of metal ripping through her flesh and eyes, red eyes, looking at her a mixture of horror and pity. Part of her knows as he rams Shinsou through her that he doesn't want to do this. She can hear it in the cadence of his speech and see it in his eyes. He is following orders.

She was screaming now. Her voice echoing across the complex that housed the Gotei 13. She could feel the metal piercing her, ripping her to shreds. She could see Ichimaru's smirk but his eyes—his red eyes held some type of pity for her.

"_You should've listen to me, Hinamori-chan."_

Aizen-taicho didn't say anything at his former lieutenant's flippant remark.

The memory holds her until arms grip her. He holds her type and for once she allows her sempai, one of the strongest people see knows, to see her truly broken.

To be continued….


End file.
